Medium Happiness » Fashion

Daily News Article About Leggings (aka Jeggings, apparently) That Look Like Jeans

admin — Thu, 07 Jan 2010 21:44:31 +0000

Just reading the headline of this post should alert you to the reality that you’ll find nothing worthwhile ahead. You can read the whole article if you really want below the main body of the post. Otherwise, I’ve culled the highlights for you here.

Author: Issie Lapowsky

Rag: Daily News

Photos:

Best sound bite:

“Jeans aren’t comfortable. For years, we’ve been faking it, calling our stomach-strangling, stiff-as-cardboard denims our second skin.”

Full article here: http://www.nydailynews.com/lifestyle/fashion/2010/01/04/2010-01-04_test_driving_jeggings_a_walk_around_new_york_wearing_denim_leggings.html

Adsanity

admin — Wed, 16 Sep 2009 20:41:12 +0000

I found the Hermes ad pictured below in the Men’s Fashion Fall 2009 NY Times Magazine. It’s one of the worst/craziest ads I’ve ever seen. I call it, Deranged Dandy Gets Lost on Orca Hunt.

“Me thinks I’ll build a fire this eve, yeah. In a firepit made of ice, yeah. Ice ‘ill do just fine. Play some chess on top of it too, yeah. Think me ties need a washin’ as well. String ‘em out across a few harpoons oughtta do.”

Hipster Jake Leg

admin — Tue, 11 Aug 2009 18:56:16 +0000

The slaves to fashion have taken to wearing some ridiculous footwear this summer. Walk around New York City and you’ll find both men and women wearing shoes with ultra thin, hard soles that impart about as much support as a bra made of of rubber bands and dental floss. Those of you with functionally high foot arches (mine are not) may be able to get away with sporting such ill-conceived footwear, but for the rest of us, with ankles that cant inward and low arches, it can turn out to be a real fucking mess. Check out this girl I spied on the way to the subway this morning. In advance, I know you’re going to say, “It’s not her shoes, you dipshit, she has a serious orthopedic issue.” I don’t think so. I think it’s those goddamn ugly boots she’s got on that are to blame. Anyhow, see for yourself.

Hipster Jake Leg from Michael Cesari on Vimeo.

Canky Cankles, Oh She’s Got Shankles

admin — Thu, 23 Jul 2009 16:19:36 +0000

A few years ago I had some friends over for St. Patrick’s Day; I cooked corned beef and cabbage and we drank a lot of beer. Eventually, the Irish mirth boiled over, my inhibitions diminished to a nonexistent level, and I launched into an impromptu session of invective acoustic singing-songwriting. My muse, er target, that evening was the dreaded cankle. I don’t think I ever came up with any verse material, and just droned around the simple chord progression F#m, A, E, singing, “canky cankles, canky cankles, canky cankles, oh she’s got shankles.” Nonsensical? Perhaps. Catchy? Goddamn right. (I may have some archival footage of me singing the song on my old, broken Sony video camera. If I find it, I’ll put it up sometime soon.)

Anyhow, a friend who was there the night I wrote “Canky” forwarded me an absolutely dubious story this morning that the Wall Street Journal is currently running about guess what? Cankles! Never would I have expected the at times conservative bastion of financial news–the WSJ–to run a story about women and fat ankles. Then again, they did post a story a few weeks ago about the great scourge of skinny jeans. And much to their discredit, interviewed about 1 Williamsburg hipster and drew all sorts of wild conclusions from his fatuous comments. Whatever. All in all, they did a decent job with this cankles primer featured below. Takeaway: Cankles are genetic misfortune. Unless you’re especially adept with a hatchet, or willing to undergo some kind of fat-removal procedure, it looks like canklers are stuck with their latent, evolutionary vestiges of the centaur.

Dubious Dump Pants

admin — Thu, 02 Apr 2009 18:42:37 +0000

Last year when I was working (without pay) for the ill-fated fashion startup FadMashion I got to interview this guy and his sister about their Toronot-based clothing line Juma. They were actually both very humble and nice considering I didn’t really know what I was talking about. Anyhow, I came across a new clothing item of theirs today and it’s absolutely one of the most insane things I’ve ever seen. I’ve taken the liberty of naming it the Dump Pant, for obvious reasons.

“When your jeans can’t possibly get any tighter and you’re finding it harder and harder to make a statement with your pants, check out the Dump Pant from Juma.”

If You Aren’t The Captain, Sometimes It’s a Good Idea to Bail. Sink Fadmashion!

admin — Wed, 11 Feb 2009 22:05:57 +0000

In my early days as a freelancer I was so gassed to get a project that I didn’t always think about what the upside was as much as I should have. The obvious “upside” answer is money, but what if you aren’t getting any?

Almost 2 years ago 3 fairly intelligent and very enthusiastic people approached me about helping them launch FadMashion.com, a fashion networking site that they promised was going to change the way high-end clothes were bought and sold. The current model basically consists of the designer, showroom, and buyer, in that order. Designers design the clothes, the clothes go to the showroom, and the buyer visits the showroom and buys or doesn’t buy the clothes. Sure, there are probably some inefficiencies in there, but as I would learn, the model works pretty well. “If it ain’t broke…” comes to mind. People like to touch and feel clothes before they buy them.

The long and short of the story is that the 3 “founders” never paid me, nothing, zip. I got invited to a few parties with warm bottles of champagne but that was it. Thankless is probably the best way to describe their MO. They weren’t so much willful as they were clueless, though.

Anyhow, after about 7 months of working for free and seeing that their online model was not financially viable, I realized there would be no upside. They were never going to have any money to pay me, even if I demanded it, and any kind of equity offer ever being worth anything was a forgone conclusion. So, I bailed.

Now there’s just the cheap shadenfreude of watching FadMashion chug along in the purgatory for sites that were conceived with good intentions but are destined to irrelevance and a slow, dying brown dwarf send off. Last I checked FadMashion was wooing people with prizes. That’s never a good sign. FadMashion, no hard feelings, but I’m glad it’s not working out. It makes me feel like I did the right thing.

World’s Heaviest Person Gets Married

admin — Tue, 28 Oct 2008 01:10:28 +0000

This guy looks happy and I am not going to sit here an make fun of him for being overweight or for having to attend his wedding riding a bed. However, I will make fun of the video below and how the commentator describes the heavy man’s choice of dress for the occasion. “The bride wore a strapless ivory dress and a tiara while the groom opted for a white silk shirt with a sheet wrapped around his legs.” What kind of pants were those again?

Here Came The Rain There Go The Cankle Boots

admin — Fri, 26 Sep 2008 14:47:45 +0000

For the love of all things holy, I really hope this is the year women stop wearing Ugg boots. Why on earth would you wear boots that make you look like a centaur? Also, news flash, they ain’t waterproof. Infact, I can’t think of anything worse to wear in the rain than a suede clodhopper that’s lined with fur (I saw several women wearing them on the subway this morning—it’s been raining here).

Please, stop wearing them.

Crocs’ Stock: A Basement Bargain

admin — Tue, 05 Aug 2008 17:38:04 +0000

Several months ago I wrote a blazing piece on the Crocs footwear company, indicting them for making such god awfully heinous shoes. Well, I am here to report that my dooms daying predictions for the company have borne fruit. The stock (CROX) is now trading near $4 a share. A significant drop from the price it was at when I wrote my article ($20) in April and a huge drop from the $80 or so it was at a year ago.

I applaud the American consumer for saying no to criminally ugly clothing.